The Second Coming

So yesterday, I had a good laugh while in the office. Like really-- Ha Ha & Ha. 

You see, I'm now like at the "second coming" stage in my life.

If I can pour my heart out to you, I will tell you that it is a difficult time for me at this moment. 

So when things become like over the head, the only way to go is to back-track. Ya, ya, blah, blah, back-track until 15 years ago and wonder what went wrong with me. Come on, I had so much learning and resources, everything went wonderfully well and then I lost sight and I lost myself, and now wham, smack, the spiral downwards is not a nice place to be. What went wrong with me? God forgive me, I didn't see this coming and I was blinded and I lost my footing. It is very hard to find my foothold but I will find it again. 

To give you an inkling how bad things were, I even thought about pulling Colin from childcare ($830 per month) and putting him at perhaps the CC kindergarten ($200?). I almost couldn't continue with his speech therapy ($700 for 10 sessions). This whole mess is very troubling for me. Then I thought I might stop Kiki's music ($500 p/m)  instead of affecting Colin's school. Amidst the trying times, she picked up Humoresque (Dvorak) on the violin which was a beautiful song. So in the end, I revolved on my credit card and am being reminded of insecure times of decades ago. 

Surely this can't be it. Have I not learnt anything? 

But you know, I don't want to struggle anymore. 

I let it all go. Surrender. I will just do my best. And hope that God forgives me for my foolishness, arrogance, and I don't know what other folly I didn't name.

All is not lost.

Surely all my practices are of value. Yes?

So I begin to read at random, revisit resources with my current eyes.

At one interview, Deepak Chopra was being asked -
 Doesn't hard work bring material success, at least?

His reply was -
Yes, but at what cost? You get this limited success (material), and you get heart attacks, you get divorced, your friendships suffer, you drink too much. The natural way is to "do less, accomplish more", and to ultimately, to do nothing and accomplish everything. 

That's when I had to laugh. Do nothing and accomplish everything? Do less for more, do nothing for all. Isn't that wishful thinking, laziness thinking or the mind of an incompetent? But of course that wasn't what he meant. You would have to find out for yourself (1) The Law of Pure Potentiality. (2) The Law of Dynamic Giving. (3) The Law of Karma. (4) The Law of Least Effort.  (5) The Law of Intention and Desire. (6) The Law of Detachment. (7) The Law of Dharma (express your talents at the service of humanity).

It is also saying that when we are riding in Nature's train, we can set down our burdens, and life will not stop giving or flourishing. (put down your luggage from your shoulder, the train will still be moving).