Wasiyah, You Are Bloody Fired!

I've fired my maid and sent her packing back to Indonesia.

It is easy for me to write about this now but when it first happened, it was definitely a huge challenge.

Over the last few months, the maid had slackened in her duties. Let's not even talk about petty things like house chores. She failed with the upkeep of cleanliness with baby's clothings, toys and generally, was not interested to care for my baby. All day, she only wants to feed the baby milk and instant rice cereals. She was not competent to cook for baby. In the middle of the night, she was not interested to hold the baby when baby cried. Every day, I take out the toys for her to play with baby but she doesn't use them.

All she cared about was to ask to go downstairs.
On the pretext of bringing baby to the playground, she would beg me, my husband and my mother to let her go out of the house. I refused because I sensed she had a different agenda.

All this time I put up with her nonsense as I felt that she was good with the baby and baby liked her over me. This is natural as I spend very little time with my baby on each working week. I leave home at 7 and will only be back by 730. I only have about an hour with baby before she goes to bed. Although I sleep with baby, the night feed is a toil to my restfulness.

Whatever the case, stress built up and I had tolerated with the situation.

On Sunday & Monday, Kiki had fever and I stayed home. My neighbour then called to inform me that she spotted my maid out with Kiki on two ocassions. She questioned the maid about whether I approved of her going out of the house and the maid lied that I did. With the pouring rain and chilly weather these past days, Kiki caught a cold and fell sick after all the rendevous. Mind you, my neighbour caught her twice but nobody knows exactly how many times she went out with my baby.

On Tuesday, the maid went missing on her own for several hours.
This was the last straw for me and I took her to the police to file a report.
Then I brought her back to the agent, bought her a plane ticket and sent her home.
She did not apologise nor was she remorseful.
I could have slapped her or shaved her head bald but I didn't.
I told myself that life with take care of it.
I let it passed.

And so my bonding with my baby began.

I used "bonding" and not "re-bonding" because it is a fact that I hadn't done my part to bond with my baby in the first place.

I had always thought that since I have to be away at work, it was better that the baby does not cling to me. Boy, am I wrong! Was I so damn wrong.

I thank Goodness that this happened as I've learnt a valuable lesson.
I am the mother.
No matter now incompetent I feel, I must not be incompetent!
Gosh, what a phrase. Ha ha.

I thank my mom for being around, my sis for ferrying us around to the new agent and to the doctors, and of course my husband for firstly, the moral support (he said "Don't Let the maid back in the house") with that, I took care of it. Secondly, for also being more involved with the baby.

We both felt very hurtful that this happened at the expense of our baby but we both drew strength that we have become more resourceful and in fact, are more competent than we thought of ourselves.

Lastly, I thank my bosses and colleagues for letting me have my time off with peace of mind from work, and also lastly, to my Godma, aunties & cousins for caring and the moral support.

And so it is.

Beauty Sleep

She's sleeping more these few days, probably due to the medicines she's taking for her stomach. This gives her rest-time and she's become a more relaxed and cheerful baby in fact!

Totally looks like a boy huh?

Nowadays, I've stopped correcting people when they call her "Di Di".

Oh, whatever!

New Skill - With The Bottle

It was a novelty for her to be able to hold her drinking bottle. The first time she could do it, she drank water from it non-stop and cried when I pulled it away.
Now, she can manoeuvre it easily.

New Sleeping Position

In the afternoons, she falls asleep like this easily.

I just need to pat her bum for a short while and she would nap.

Art Introduction

Finally, I've finally signed up for an art class.
Painting is something that I've always want to pursue.
I dabble a little here and there but I've never learned the fundamental.
I thought that my sketches are great, until I see the others' paintings, and I would wonder if I could ever have that kind of standards.
The art class I've joined is wonderful. The coach says please don't call him "teacher/coach/instructor", just call him by his name. He says because he may also be learning from us. So he said, just be yourself, learn the fundamentals and PAINT!

I attended the introductory workshop with a pen and note pad. But they were not used. Instead, right away we were taught to set up our stations and paint immediately. There were only one other girl (Yolanda) and I who are totally amateurs. We made such fundamental "mistakes" but I thoroughly enjoyed the session even though I was clueless about some things and at times felt intimidated.

I looked at some senior students doing their pieces and I was in awe. I couldn't help thinking when will I be able to do that.

Although I wish I could fly, I must have the discipline to learn to walk.

And so, this is by far, one of the happiest thing I have done for myself.

Hip Hip, Hooray!

Saturday, 14th November

We went to the Godmas' again.

This time, Kiki did great. She played and laughed a lot. She even ate porridge that my Godma made. Who wouldn't? That porridge took 5 painsaking hours to make. Wholesome goodness all consumed. I've learnt (in theory) how to prepare the porridge and today, I made some fish porridge which Kiki took well to it.

The Mother-child Chair

This Bamboo Chair is at least 40-year-old. You can use it as a stool when it is on its four legs, or you can use it to sit your baby when turned on its side. Hence, its name - Mother-child chair.

It has gone through my elder and younger cousins, myself and now the babies.

It is broken at some parts because Ah Di was once "trapped" in there, when desperate, my uncle broken it to free his son, and a few similar incidents.

Although Ryan is only 9 mths old, he could almost climb out from it.

I think the babies nowadays are more daring and explorative, especially so since Ryan is a boy.

Kiki explores by licking its surface, but we stopped her as.... well, the chair is 40 years old!

I want a Tricycle, a Tricycle.

Brought Kiki to my Grandpa's house. She took quite a long time before breaking off the crying spell. (over an hour!). Good thing she napped and later became more interactive. Also, there were many toys to play with. She was specially amused with sitting in the tricycle, although of course it only serves as a seat for the moment. I asked my cousin Hong Jing to give me the tricycle since she hardly uses it but she, being a kid, refused. Young children may not know the meaning of sharing or parting as they are still very self-centered. This is normal and we should not force them but rather, just coach them into understanding but do allow time for them to grow.

7th Nov

My cousin Hong Jing's feeding Kiki some water.

Aunt Serene & the two girls.

Sis' BD

Andy Warhol- Quote

Oh So Lovely

Going to the Grandpa's.

It was disasterous.
She cried so vehemently and I couldn't coax her out of it.
Really stressed me out.
I really think that I shouldn't bring her to others' homes. It's causing too much stress for me, for her and for our hosts.
*sigh. I must attempt again and hope for a sunny day.

November O-nine (Prelude)

It's only 3rd Nov and I've had two birthday celebrations already.

How am I to stick to my diet plan. I've so gruelingly lost 2 kg and I've got 7 more to go.

The first session was at the office, it's a monthly birthday party for staff.

The second one was a nice surprise, as it was supposed to be Joy's farewell dinner.

Met my ex-colleagues from some 16 years ago, for dinner at this Japanese restaurant that serves superb sashimi and oysters. And some creative, delicious sushi from the chef. I can say that again. I really wish to bring everyone there to savour, but first, I want to shed some weight.

Last night's farewell dinner was for Joy, she is going home. She's been working in Singapore for 17 years and her work has brought her back to Manila. I never did think she wouldn't want to live in Singapore forever. Already, at dinner, half of my friends would want to retire somewhere other than in Singapore and some are already residing elsewhere.

I wish Joy the best, continue to be joyous, purposeful and to live her dreams.

I really love this bunch of people.

After the birthday song, G. asked :"so how old are you?"

"I'm 36! BOO HOO HOO!" I mock-sobbed.

"Hey! That's insulting him, her, her and her!" PW said.

G still can't stop reminding me that when he first knew me, I was 20.

Floral Dress

Nikon Coolest Pix

Birthday came early-- I bought myself a new camera!

I tell you, I've had many cameras before and they are all the unconventional ones.

I've had Polaroids, Lomo cams (two of them), Casio Exlim (it is still the world's slimmest and lightest), and now-- the world's first camera with built-in projector!

Cool!

Of The Blue Sky

Apples & Bananas

Shaved half an apple, cook it over medium fire. Add a little water.

Chop a banana into cubes, cook together.

Optional: Add a little butter. (note: unsalted!)

Puree it with blender.

She loves it! Yum, yum.

How Now Brown Cow?

Is blending fresh apple not apple puree?

I googled and found this video http://www.videojug.com/film/how-to-make-apple-puree
The apples are being boiled before meshing, and it doesn't look oxidized! Gosh.

The puree I've made is so oxidized that I don't think it serves much nutrients eating it.

I think I really need to research on making baby food.

***

Gosh gosh. Supposed to cook any fruits before feeding.

Sharks. Got to seriously go read up! help!

***

Saving Grace! Avocado need not be cooked. Even for an infant. *phew!

One simple recipe http://www.wholesomebabyfood.com/avocadobabyfoodrecipes.html

Creamy Banana-Cado Baby Food
Peel and de-pit a ripe avocado. Cut “meat” out and mash with a fork. Peel and mash 1 banana. Place in a blender or food processor and puree until desired texture is achieved. Avocados and Bananas do not need to be cooked.

Of Potty & Winter

Winter in East Coast.
Kiki looks as if she was going somewhere cold.
Indeed, the shopping centres in Singapore are cold.
So much energy to keep the buildings cool, yet the generators emit even more heat to the atmosphere. Try standing behind an air-con generator and you will know what I mean.
I never did care until I watched I "an inconvenient truth". Although I still feel that even if I think green or go green, my efforts alone will not be able to effect major change, which is what we need. Rain (new colleague) reminded me that if everyone who thinks like me put in an effort, there will surely be results. So, ya, I will be mindful of the resources that we have and with my personal effort, be green. (having said that, I am not ready to be a fanatic, so please don't talk to me about carbon footprints and all). http://www.climatecrisis.net/


First time using the potty today. It is funny how she natrually grunts when she poops.

Probably, making that noise made it easier.

Poem

Found this poem on the net:-

If I had my child to raise again

If I had my child to raise over again I'd build self-esteem first, and the house later.

I'd finger paint more and point fingers less. I would do less correcting and more connecting.

I'd take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes.

I would care to know less and know to care more I'd take more hikes and fly more kites.

I'd stop playing serious, and seriously play. I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars.

I'd do more hugging and less tugging. I'd see the oak tree in the acorn more often.

I would be firm less often and affirm much more.

I'd model less about the love of power, And more about the power of love.

By: Diane Looman "Full esteem ahead" (via Little Red Bus)