Before we know it, the year is over. It will always feel like it was over in forty winks.
I write so often and I reflect often, there is nothing out-of-the-world I have to say about 2014.
Besides Gratitude, it is still Gratitude.
Without Gratitude, there will be no Happiness because I will always want more. More money, more time, more freedom, more skills, more confidence, more health, more stuff, more discipline, more stamina, more determination, basically, more of everything I desire. But of course I already have them. I only want more of everything good. Who wouldn't.
2014 has been wonderful. The kids grew a little more co-operative with each other, last night, Colin refused to go to bed, he wanted to play with Rachael till the end of time and he wanted to sleep in our bedroom with us. I also wish that I could accommodate that but I was rather tired. I don't know why the pain at the side of my knee is back. I think it has to do with the back-cracking last Wednesday at the Sinseh. Sometimes I feel so embarrassed that I limp like an old lady. Especially during the kids' music class when I have to sit on the floor prolonged, and then get up and move about.
2014 has been rather emotional for me. I am not too sure if it has anything to do with hormones but I had noticed that I was feeling more blue. But of course I take three steps back to reflect and check if it was an old issue, new issue or just some feelings that purged. I also take care to check that I snap out of it instead of indulging in feeling blue. There are more than enough good things to focus on, also -- misery has expired!
2014 has been wonderful. Although I really think that I could have done more (I still have not started to pick up Gavotte, am I procrastinating because it is difficult?). The kids are more demanding in terms of playtime. It took me three months to find the time to bring them to the swing. And I still owe her the game arcade as well as roller blading (not to mention swimming). As for Colin, he still doesn't recognise the alphabets and I think he doesn't know all the numbers too. I am sure it will come to him in time, I just hope I can carve out a reading schedule for him and I hope his reading interest will come quickly. Also, I am supposed to bring him to the Pediatrician for a developmental check as recommended by his school.
2014- I've learned that nothing will work unless it is sustainable, be it a forming a new habit, a goal or any changes we want to make. So for 2015, "Sustainability" will be my "super-word-of-the-year". I have to go map out my KPI pie-chart again. I must under-plan, under-target, and under-schedule my schedules for 2015. Because if I spread myself too thinly, I will achieve at nothing. Like a thin spread of Nutella on bread is not fulfilling nor satisfying. Might as well sustain on little, daily habits in order to have a better shot. This is probably easier said than done, so I really hope I can remember this. 20% effort gets 80% of the work done. If I am using 80% of my energy on too many tasks, then it is not sustainable. So, stay focused on how to use 20% effort majorly. To Sustainability and beyond!
2015 - I want to use more of my heart.
I had been using a lot of logical thinking, I think,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, I want to be even more honest with myself. My friend Val says that she does not know of anyone who is more in-touch with her/his feelings than me but I think,,,,,,,,,,,,,, I want to be even more honest with myself and perhaps also be more direct with everyone else. Because there is no point second guessing anyone or any situation. Second guessing causes misunderstandings, and also it is not healthy to talk about our displeasure if we had not dealt with it openly or simply clarify. I hope the world will move on to be more open and be over-and-done-with pettiness and defensiveness.
2015 - my sis is getting married.
And that's a big deal for me.
Happy New Year, everyone. I wish you all the goodness you never knew you deserved.
