Furby attended the party too.
It wasn't much of a party, it was cake-cutting and song-singing.
Followed by a simple dish at Botak Jones, we both shared a lamb chop. I
like lamb more than any other meat and I am honestly in conflict with
myself. Ever since I've read that
we shouldn't eat the animal we couldn't
bring ourselves to kill with our hands, it has bugged me. Ever since. We let
the farmhouse do the killing as we don't have the mental capacity to
deal with the blood nor the heart to eat the animal if we see its eyes or feel for it. So it means that we take away gruesomeness from the equation and cook a piece of meat without feeling much pain but savour in gourmet pleasures. There was once, I was at the jetty where there were a few people fishing. They had only hooked up small, yellow-tail fishes like Kuning Fish, and left the fishes on the jetty gasping for air. I think I was pretty much disturbed, so-much-so that I broke down and cried. I don't know how we could eat an animal that had just fought so hard to stay alive. Having said that, I have not turned vegan nor vegetarian. Please do not judge me, I am a harsher judge on myself than anyone else. At least I know it when I'm conflicted. For now what works is that I am just more mindful when I eat and be thankful for the proteins and energy I gain to fuel my living.
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