(Above is not entirely correct. They send threats to Employers of Domestic Helpers. The Employers are not debtors nor are Employers liable for loans taken out by helpers, furthermore, the integrity of the claims of loans is highly questionable)
The effects of receiving aggressive threats over a period do not just end with a flip of the switch.
The mind does not work that way.
If it does, it would be so easy to programme it.
Two nights ago, I dreamt that my ex-helper was rounded up by loan sharks at the airport. We were like waiting for her departure flight but in the interim, those bullies rounded us up and was threatening to kidnap her but it was not so easy for them because the airport was a public place.
Me on the other hand, although was desperate to get her out from the hostage situation, tried my best to think on my feet. I quickly went to where she had left her carry-on bags and rummaged through her bag and found a zip lock bag with I think was some kind of sandwich and she kept her e-air ticket in that zip lock bag together with the sandwich, presumably to camouflage the air ticket.
I held the air ticket tightly in my fist and was determined to go back to where she was being held, and to collect her, and escort her through the departure gates. I had a renewed sense of determination and confidence that we are at our last leg and it is our every right to leave the bullies behind us.
The dream is just a form of purging of mental toxic for me.
It is a form of post traumatic stress purging, and the beauty of it is that I am somewhat having the ability to determine how my dream unfolds. I am interacting and I am able to narrate and determine the actions of my dream self. I am able to command purposeful actions and determination just like in real life. So I suppose when I can do lucid dreaming, I am more in control of my mental states and I do take this as a sign of healing and empowering of my real life mental state.
So, I hope in time, I will be able to feel whole again.
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